Why do things have to change? Why can't they stay the same?

Every time I go back to Seattle I repeatedly ask these questions. Although isolated, I had so much fun in seattle as a kid. Things were different and unique. In the late 70s, early 80s, Seattle was crippled economically, which actually made for the best place to grow up in - it was a constant. Nothing ever changed - rarely were things built or torn down. In the 90s that all started to change and every time I go back, the town seems less like the place I where grew up.

I have been thinking a lot today about Seattle Center, non seattlites will know it as the location of the Space Needle. Seattlites my age will know it best as the site of school field trips (Pacific Science Center and Fun Forest), concerts (the awesome Bumbershoot festival - Rock! Arena, and giant shows at the coliseum - now Key Arena) and the snackapalooza that is the Center House (or Food Circus as locals call it).

The Seattle Center was the home of the 1962 world's fair (for viewing see It Happened at the World's Fair starring Elvis and a little chinese girl), for which most of the buildings were constructed. For years after, not much changed - things were painted, sponsorship logos removed but even in the 80s you could still feel the ghosts of the fair. So much so that I get de ja vu when I see footage and it was 14 years before my birth! The best relic of the fair was the "bubbleator". A globe shaped clear elevator that moved people from the 1st to the 2nd floor of the Food Circus. By the late 80s the bubbleator was in total disrepair and instead of fixing it the city decided to get rid of it. I have often wondered what happened to it and after some searching on google, now I know:

Bubbleator Then:


Bubbleator Now:


It just makes me kind of sad - so I say again - Why do things have to change? Why can't they stay the same?

Found!!!! (pictures for your amusement)

Found! in the work clipart under Business and Occupations (no, I am not kidding)


Found! in my email inbox because finding pictures like this is how other non-working coworkers kill time (that is one big cat)

Wear that sweater - uh, I don't think so

Okay - let's call a spade a spade here. As long as daniel doesn't have frequent regular access to email at his job this blog is going to turn into an all day work bitch session. Not that I really bitch about work that much in my emails to Daniel, it is just that they took up a lot of my otherwise not busy day. Since I am sure that most of you don't want to hear about my myriad of financial troubles or my feelings about the sex I had last night or will have tonight - this is what you get - work bitching. I hope you like it:

There is an "office sweater" for the creative services department. What is an "office sweater" you ask? It is one black stockinette stitch sweater that just sits in the office waiting for someone to get cold. I don't even want to think about how many people have worn this sweater over the years (it looks like it is from 1985 and may very well be), it makes my stomach turn. Everytime I make the slightest mention of it being chilly in the office, I immediately get "do you want to use the sweater?" No, I don't want to use the sweater - the mere suggestion makes me want to hurl.

Please lord, make the pain stop

On play two cubes in front of me: Crusin' - the Gwyneth Paltrow, Huey Lewis version from Duets.

Fuck your fucking herbal supplements

I came into work today and discovered a manila envelope sitting on my chair. I haven't opened it yet because I am afraid that if I break the seal, I'll become a scientologist. I have been informed by my cube neighbor that it is information from her regarding a "herbal supplement that changes your body chemistry on a cellular level"

Are you kidding me with this shit?

She went on to say that it is full of nutrients that our body needs that haven't been around for hundreds of years (I am sure at this point my eyes had fully rolled back into my head). If our body needs them so bad, why aren't we dead? Riddle me that, batman!

Seriously though, here is what I want to know - why isn't this kind of shit considered harassment? This person also spends all day trying to tell me what to eat (is she diabetic - no but she is on the fat flush diet so she considers herself some sort of nutritional authority). There should really be some sort of workplace policy about this sort of thing.

In other news - one week until I am back in sunny LA for a little mini vacation with Daniel. I am excited to see little Emerson again (as well as Erin and Koji). I also wish I could find my friend gloria's phone number so I can go with her to the crazy asian jazz bar but I think I lost it in one of my many moves. Mostly I am excited because Daniel has never been to LA (or to CA or to the west coast, for that matter) and I love showing off my beautiful west coast. I will go home eventually.

Today's Rant

Do not talk to me with your mouth full! It is disgusting. What is with the people in this place? Also, I don't want to hear about your herbal supplements that will "cure" my diabetes. Just shut up.

Side Note

Evan - what is wrong with your comments section? I have things to say about your shuffle.

Two posts in one day - is that some sort of record?

My head is killing me. I have been the mistress of chronic headaches lately. I thought it was lack of caffeine related but I have had plenty of that today. Maybe I just have a headache because I suck. Normally I would think that I am awesome but my head just hurts too much to psyche myself up.

I am tremendously bored again, though I am technically "working". What am I doing? You ask. Color double side printing booklets that I designed for a work event tomorrow night. They are very boring and have 52 of the most disturbing headshots I have ever seen. At 15 pages a minute - slow as molasses - I swear these things will never get done. I think 15 is a generous estimate.

We had to go to a lunchtime meeting where I was given free lunch (the one day I remember to bring one). It wouldn't have been the worst meeting in the world except that I got extremely pissed off and bitter watching women twice my age and weight shovel desserts in their fat faces while I couldn't touch mine. I wanted to jump up and scream midmeeting - "It isn't fucking fair! You guys are total fat slobs! Why don't you have diabetes?" I didn't say anything but it did make me physically ill watching them eat. This job is totally getting me down.

So if you want a one sentence status update on my life: I feel like a failure and would kill my own mother for some chocolate.

Sarah Vowell, You Make Me So Angry

1. You are going to every city but Denver on your book tour. You can drag your ass to Madison and Boise but not Denver. Did you just decide to bypass the second tier and go straight to the third tier cities? Where's the logic in that?

2. According to Amazon, your new book is not available for pickup at my local Borders. Yes, I realize Borders is ass but I am broke and have a gift card. No, I can not drive to another Borders, I am conserving gas.

3. Men find your squeaky voice endearing and, dare I say it, sexy. I completely lack any sort of talent for turning a physical drawback into an attribute. Not only am I angry but I am jealous of you. Even Conan O'Brien is your bitch.

Bored Beyond Belief

Have you noticed that I rarely write anything here anymore? Maybe it has something to do with the fact that I no longer work at home (maybe it has everything to do with that). Well today I am going to lay it all out for you as I have nothing better to do. Normally I would be emailing back and forth with Daniel about some nonsense. As he has no internet today, instead I am sitting at work with nothing to do but apply for other jobs and think about how I desperately want a haircut (and color) and some new jeans that don't fall off my ass.

Diabetes Upside: When your blood sugar is out of control, your body can't process the food you eat so it burns up your fat reserves. Basically it is like starving but you can eat all day. I now weigh less than I have since I lived with Adam - shit that was a long time ago. How did I get so fat? Especially with a guy who weighs (or maybe weighed, who can say now?) 125 pounds.

Diabetes Downside: I don't have any money for new jeans that don't fall off my ass.

Actually, I don't have money for anything, even the parking lot I park at every day because I can't get my act in gear early enough to take the bus. I am living in serious denial about my financial situation - it is going to have to stop.

For the last couple of days I have been a really crabby baby. I think the reality of the diabetes thing has really set in and it is messing with my head in a big way. It was one of those weekends where all of my pet peeves were just sending me right over the edge. Normally, no matter how much something bothers me, I can overlook it in the people I love. This weekend wasn't one of those times. Tables manners, bad grammar, telling me how to solve my problems, kickball religious chants, too many clothing layers (yes, I realize it was very cold out) - it was all making me fucking crazy.

I am pretty much over all of it now as even in the midst of my annoyance, I am pretty good at stepping back and seeing how unreasonable I am being. Though I will say these two things - 1. Why do people think that having good table manners is about how they should or shouldn't be acting? Like it is pretentious or something. Why don't people realize that good table manners are about other people not having to look at the bad table manners. Enough said - it really isn't that big a deal. 2. Here's a little secret (secret no more) I hate food noises - like the noises people make when they eat. It isn't specific to anyone or a particular eating style - I hate even the quietest swallow. Normally I can just deal but when I am crabby - it is like fingernails on a blackboard.

Now you see it - Now you don't. This post was twice as long before but I reread it and decided that it was too crabby and paranoid. I don't want to be one of those blogger types.