Run, Forest Run !

So I just got back from the doctor and have braces on both legs. The upside is that with the help of crutches, I can walk. The downside is that my knees are to quote my doctor "a mess" and I will probably need surgery on one or both. I will know more after my MRI appointment. The leg braces are quite a silly sight though. I got more than a few stares at the chik-fil-a when Natalie and I ate there while we were waiting for my percoset prescription. I look like one of Jerry's Kids.

I am supposed to go to the Nuggets/Pistons game tomorrow and I am hoping that I will still be able to do that. Though I am sure the Nuggets will get their asses kicked, it will be fun to see the Nugget Dancers or as I like to call them the Nuggettes. The last game I was at they were pretty boring but my friend saw them do a risky business routine one time that I would like to catch.

Other than that, things are pretty much status quo. I miss my dogs.

I've got a brand new pair of roller skates, you've got a brand new key

I can't sleep so I decided to watch Boogie Nights, which is one of the movies that Mike brought up when he was nice enough to move my tv and DVD player from downstairs to my bedroom. Normally I find Boogie Nights to be an uplifting movie (though most people probably wouldn't) between the music, the clothes, the sex, and the "oh my god I am so glad this isn't happening to me" ending. Tonight, however, I seem to be spending the whole time thinking about rollergirl's skates and how jealous I am of her.

I have relocated back to my house and while very lonely, it is nice that I don't have to worry about invading someone else's space on top of everything else. Despite the fact that those stone cold fools in NY kept sending it, I couldn't bring myself to do any work today. I was just too bummed out and I hate that job so much. I really feel like I have hit some sort of bottom. I need drastic changes to my life.

Do you know what would be great right now? A hot tub. Oh except I can't get my splint wet.

Okay, it is late. More tomorrow when I can think a bit better.

Flat Out Fucked

So my first week back at derby from my sprained ankle and I took the fall to end all falls on Friday night. After the incredibly humiliating trip on a rolling office chair out to the car, I spent four plus hours at the ER to discover that one knee is broken and the other has a pulled tendon or some such shit. I will know more after I go to the orthopedic doctor this week. I am just so angry, there aren't even words to express it (though mostly it looks like shit, fuck, shit, I fucking hate this). Not only am I completely helpless, as I can barely walk, and in pain but I really feel like I just want to break things and scream, though I am mostly keeping it together. Which isn't easy to do when it takes you 20 minutes to get the the bathroom ten feet away.

I feel completely helpless and totally humiliated. I am staying with a friend of mine, (I have this weird feeling that he had some sort of weekend plans that I totally interrupted but he won't tell me). Although this is a very good friend, if I had a choice, I wouldn't really want anyone seeing me in this gross unshowered state (I can't get my splint wet). Plus I had to send him to the store to buy me some clean clothes. It's good that he is the type of friend who doesn't freak out when I ask him to buy me underwear. In a way, he is almost too nice because then I just sit around, on my pain killers, crying about how I will never have a boyfriend like this guy. I am definitely in a funk, to say the least.

I wish I had something funny to tell everyone but it just isn't going to happen right now. Unless you consider my complete inability to take care of myself funny, which some people might. My blog is a drag.